Friday Funny

 Tactical Fuzz…that’s the police!! -Katie

Friday Funny

 K, in the middle of calling me short: Hey, wait...can your contacts fog up?

Friday Funny

 K: I found out I could over ride the Roku remote with my phone, and dad was like, “What?!”

J: It didn’t take me very long to figure it out.

K: Stupid college.

Friday Funny

It’s room temperature outside. -Katie

Friday Funny

Katie, after reading about DNA modification in biology: Do not mess with plant or animal DNA because that could result in a batch of killer corn. 

Friday...Funny, Maybe

Watching Little Women...

Gabby: In the sequel we need him [Professor Bhaer] and Amy to cccclick [drawing finger across her neck].

Katie: Our Christianity makes us go to a rather dark place, since they can't just get divorced.

Yikes!

Friday Funny

G: I can touch the ceiling! [from the bathroom she's preparing to paint]
K: Are you standing on the toilet?
G: No, I'm not standing in the toilet!
K: ON not IN!  [three second pause] From a poop pot you came, and to a poop pot you shall return.

If you don't know the context for that, here is the 2011 poop pot post.

Friday Funnies

Background: Over dinner I tell the family that there is someone in our HOA complaining about a rooster in the neighborhood.  They are not allowed in the city limits at all, and chickens, even hens are forbidden by our HOA.  They are having animal control come look for it each day.

Later in the evening we see a police car go by, then a helicopter go over.

Katie: They must be looking for that rooster! 🐓

*****

Justin and I hug.

Ellie: Oh no, they are falling in love again!
Nate: Are they still making a scene?
Gabby: [wretching noises]
Katie: Gabby can't have dessert—she just got sick!

Friday Funnies

As we're in the car the song “No one like you, Jesus” is playing, and I here this behind me:

Nate, its like heavy metal for kids...it has drums and guitars! -E

Chris Tomlin is most decidedly NOT heavy metal.

*    *    *     *     *

When the helpful barista brought out the biggest box they had to try to help Katie and her friend who were planning a project (it was about a foot square):

I should have asked if they had a box we could fit a body in. -K

Thankful that she did not!

Happy Friday!

Kristy

Friday Funnies

Justin was telling a story about some grad students, after a party, make a mess of (his) the first year grad student office one night:

Justin: There was crayon everywhere.  It took me forever to get it off my desk.  I didn't even try to get it off the wall.

Kate: It sounds like a bunch of two year olds!

Nate: Except the two year olds couldn't get up that high.  [thinking] Unless the drunk people picked up the two year olds and let them color on the desk and walls!

Friday Funny

Me: How do you think our book ends?

Kate: Did it win any awards?  If it won an award, someone dies.

*     *     *     *     *

I don't think she's ever going to forgive me for Bridge to Terabithia...

Friday Funny

Kate: Gabby has a sore throat, and I have a headache.  That makes a cold!  Can we have a sick day?

Uh, no.

 

Friday Funny

Kate: I wouldn't fancy being a cook in Teddy Roosevelt's house when he was a kid!

Me: Why?  (internally laughing that she used the word fancied)

Kate: Because he was always putting dead mice and rats in ice buckets to do experiments on.

Ew, me either.

Friday Funnies

Kate: Ah, gum.  There are just so many wonderful memories with gum.

*     *     *     *     *

At bedtime prayers...

Me: I'm thankful for my best friend.

Nate: Who's your best friend?

Me: Your Daddy.

Nate (a little huffily): Oh.

Me: Well, who did you think was my best friend?

Nate: Me.

Sweetness.

Friday Funnies

Kate: Can I read this book [The Worst Case Survival Handbook]?

Me: I guess...

Kate: Good.  I really need to learn how to pass a bribe.

*     *     *     *     *

Me: So what did you learn?

Kate: I learned how to jump from one building to another!

(of course...)

*     *     *     *     *

Overheard later...

Kate: Nate this is how you escape from being tied up.

Friday Funny

Nate: I think that that star is the sun's evil twin.

Kate: You have watched too many documentaries.

Nate: That's it!

Friday Funnies

Kate pulled out one of the very old books that I inherited when my grandmother passed away (it was actually her father's book, so it is 94 years old) for story time, "I want to read Megadeth."

Macbeth.  Macbeth.  I think the bard might be spinning.  And we didn't read Macbeth for story time.

*     *     *     *     *

Kool-aid?  Who is Kool-aid? -Nate

I count that as a win.

Friday Funny

In children's section of the art museum there were several signs indicating things that one could do with a smart phone.

Kate: It was take a picture with your i-phone, make a video with your i-phone.  I-phone, i-phone, i-phone.

Nate: Nope.  Eye ball, eye ball, eye ball.  Use your eye ball, you goober.

*     *     *     *    *

We obviously don't have an i-phone.

Friday Funny

Overheard from the back of the van...

Kate: Have you had lime juice?

Nate: No.

Kate: Have you had a lime?

Nate: Yes.

Kate: Well think of a lime and take away everything except the juice.

Nate: Hmm.  I need lime juice.  And bacon.

Gabby: I don't think that's right.

Friday Funny

I'm 108 months old! -Kate
I'm 83!! - Gabby